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Your Own Worst Nightmare

from Just 'Cause by Elizabeth Smart

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lyrics

well, hey, way to go dean, you guessed it
your worst nightmare is me
‘cause I know how you look into the mirror
and hate everything you see

do you have original thoughts, dean?
or do you just want to be like your dad?
‘cause you can wear his clothes and you can listen to his music
but you’ll never have his love like sammy had

so what are you gonna do, dean? you gonna cry about it?
I guess you’ll go to hell for your mistakes
and now you know how demons are made there
and it won’t take long for you to break

I know my brother’s fighting somewhere out there
and it is so hard to admit that I’m scared
it’s been so easy to pretend I don’t care
but what do you do when you’re your own worst nightmare?

can’t raise your fingers and snap me away dean
you’re stuck in here, you’ll find
and you’re too stupid to get a way out now,
‘cause you’re trapped in your own mind

you’ll always be daddy’s blunt little instrument
a shield and nothing more
it’s a good thing you sold your soul to save your little brother
‘cause without sam, what the hell are you good for?

so what are you gonna do, dean? you gonna cry about it?
you know that every word I say is true
you don’t care if you live or if you die, now
your own father didn’t care, so why should you?

I know my brother’s fighting somewhere out there
and it is so hard to admit that I’m scared
it’s been so easy to pretend I don’t care
but what do you do when you’re your own worst nightmare?

my father was an obsessed bastard
I didn’t deserve what he put on me
all that crap about protecting sam
when he’s the one who couldn’t save his family

I don’t deserve to die, I don’t deserve hell
you say I don’t matter but I do because
my dad’s the one who was never there for sam
and I, I always was

and I know my brother’s fighting somewhere out there
and it is so hard to admit that I’m scared
it’s been so easy to pretend I don’t care
but what do you do when you’re your own worst nightmare?

credits

from Just 'Cause, released February 7, 2013

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